May 17

Episode 122: How Judy Helps Her Clients Get Rid of the Head Trash That Limits Them and Causes Stress


In today’s episode, Mike talks with Judy Kane. Judy helps her clients get rid of the head trash that’s limiting them and causing them stress.

She’s the founder of Aligned Consciousness, and in that role, she helps people identify and transform the subconscious beliefs to keep them repeating ineffective and stressful patterns. Her clients experience changes that allow them to achieve their goals with ease and comfort. She’s also the author of Your4Truths: How Beliefs Impact Your Life.

Judy Kane’s Bio

Judy Kane, the founder of Aligned Consciousness, helps people identify and transform the subconscious beliefs that keep them repeating ineffective, stressful patterns. Her clients experience changes that allow them to achieve their goals —with ease and comfort. She is the author of Your4Truths: How Beliefs Impact Your Life. Judy also hosts workshops and presents in group sessions, conferences, and podcasts. Originally from Richmond, Virginia, she lives near Tampa Bay, Florida, usually with a rescued cat or dog (or two) as part of her household.

Topics in This Episode

  • Judy defines ‘head trash’ as subconscious beliefs that block people from achieving their goals and cause unnecessary stress. She works with her clients to recognize these beliefs and rewrite them, aligning their subconscious with their conscious goals.
  • When a subconscious belief is changed, it’s permanently altered. But sometimes there may be layers to the issue, or the client may be attached to their past story. In these cases, traditional coaching can be beneficial for maintaining behavior changes.
  • Common Struggles of Entrepreneurs: According to Judy, entrepreneurs frequently struggle with issues related to self-worth and safety. Their fears can vary, including fear of success, fear of failure, and fear of being seen or heard. Many entrepreneurs also have complex attitudes towards money.
  • Transitioning from Corporate to Entrepreneurship: Those moving from a corporate role to becoming an entrepreneur often subconsciously believe they won’t earn as much as they did in their corporate job. They may also feel uncomfortable with the sales aspect of running a business, struggle to determine their pricing, and might face fear of exposure or visibility.
  • Addressing Subconscious Beliefs: Judy emphasizes the importance of addressing subconscious beliefs that may be hampering one’s success. Her book, “Your4Truths”, delves into four truths of safety, worthiness, feeling valued, and feeling lovable, offering insights into subconscious beliefs that could hinder these realities.
  • Personal Example of Overcoming Fears: Judy shares her personal experience of overcoming her fear of being in the spotlight using tools to change her beliefs, emphasizing that similar transformations are possible for everyone.
  • Satisfaction in Helping Clients: Judy finds fulfillment in her work, knowing that each session makes some positive change in her clients’ lives. She emphasizes that people do not have to stay stuck with troubling issues and can change their situations.
  • Recap of Main Message: The main message is that if things keep repeating in an unsatisfactory manner, there might be subconscious beliefs at work against you. However, these can be changed and people are not necessarily stuck with them.

Links & Resources Mentioned…

Read The Transcript

Mike O'Neill: Welcome back to the Get Unstuck and On Target podcast. I'm Mike O'Neill with Bench Builders and with leadership coaching and people skills training, we help companies solve the people problems that are slowing their growth. Joining me today is Judy Kane. Judy helps her clients get rid of the head trash that's limiting them and causing them stress.

She's the founder of Aligned Consciousness, and in that role, she helps people identify and transform the subconscious beliefs to keep them repeating ineffective and stressful patterns. Her clients experience changes that allow them to achieve their goals with ease and comfort. She's also the author of Your4Truths: How Beliefs Impact Your Life.

Welcome, Judy.

Judy Kane: Thank you, I'm so happy to be here.

Mike O'Neill: You know, Judy, when we first met, the thing that caught my attention is how I opened this introduction. I just love when I was able to read that you help your clients get rid of the head trash, right? I just love it. So let's just start with that tagline. What is it about head trash that has such a powerful effect on us?

Judy Kane: Well, the, you know, the term is people immediately know what you're talking about, the stuff that's just there that you don't want, you don't know why it's there. Right. And it gets in your way. It's keeping people from achieving the goals that they want or it's causing stress that they don't need to be experiencing.

So, what I do is help people figure out what those beliefs actually are and change 'em. We rewrite 'em so that their subconscious has a different set of beliefs to support their conscious goals.

Mike O'Neill: You know, you named your business Align Consciousness. Tell a little more about that. Why did you choose that as your company name?

Judy Kane: For that reason because you want your subconscious to support your conscious goals, right? And you get those subconscious beliefs by most of 'em, by the time you're seven years old. And they can be great. I mean, some of 'em help you. They, you know, they give you your values. They let you know what's safe.

They actually define your perception of the world. They are responsible for 95% of your behavior. But sometimes they aren't aligned with what you consciously want to be true, right? You might learn things when you were little that make it difficult to achieve the goals that you've been thinking of and trying for.

So when you can change those subconscious beliefs to support the conscious goals, that's when you're in what people might call flow. Right? When things just seem to happen well for you and easily for you. And so my business helps people align those two levels of consciousness.

Mike O'Neill: Judy, another reason I was interested in having you as a podcast guest is as you know, I am a coach.

I'm also a consultant, and my understanding is a lot of your clients bring their clients to you because these are coaches, and I just thought that's intriguing. Can you tell us a little more about how that works?

Judy Kane: Absolutely. Yeah, it was a brilliant idea. One of my clients had a long time ago a coach came to me, she had one session, and at the end of it she says, I wanna put you in my coaching package for all my clients.

And I thought, well, that sounds nice. I think that would be lovely. Right. And since then I've discovered that's a really good way to help. You know, all side, all parties involved, right? Coaches have clients who get stuck in their coaching packages. Might not be all of them, you know, but they're, everybody's familiar.

If you've been coaching of the person who they agree to do the thing and time after time, they come back and they haven't done the thing, right? And coaches might think they haven't been clear enough or that the client doesn't care that much or isn't working that hard, but frequently it's the subconscious is keeping that client from doing the thing cause it just makes it really difficult for them to carry through on that intention. So I work with a lot of coaches to help those clients get unstuck, basically. They'll, some of 'em, sometimes I'm in their packages and everybody gets me. Other times coaches refer out as needed, but they will send, they'll notice that there's a place where the client just can't go forward easily.

And they'll send them to me and we'll work on changing those subconscious beliefs that are causing the issue. And then they can go back and be more successful in that coaching package. Usually it's not more than one session to get so that they can get past that thing that's stopping them.

Mike O'Neill: You know, when you shared that, that statistic, if I could use that term, it's usually not more than one session. I know I did a little bit of a double take. Because that kind of surprised me. It says to me, you're able to help your clients get to the root pretty quickly.

Judy Kane: Yes. The change process itself is pretty straightforward and it's usually less than five minutes to change any one belief.

Now situations are frequently caused by more than one belief. Things aren't always that straightforward. But when somebody's been working with a coach, they've already narrowed down a lot of what's probably the issue there. So by the time, if they come to me from a coaching program where they've already been looking at this from multiple directions usually it's you know, one session can make the difference in them being able to move forward.

Now, when I get clients that come straight to me without coaches, it might be one session, it might be a few more, but I don't tend to have long-term relationships with clients for the same thing they might come because they have a lot of things they wanna change, but it's not usually for the same topic that they, you know, we see each other for months.

It doesn't usually work that way.

Mike O'Neill: Judy, I think we cross path in that we both are in the same coaching community. Yes. And a coaching community is comprised just of that coaches who come together to, to learn and support each other and those who support coaches. And it was when you introduced yourself at one point that I heard that and I go, oh, that's interesting. And that resulted in you and I scheduling kind of a one-on-one call and that's when I learned how you came about this role. It's a little bit of a non-traditional progression for you. Can you share a little bit about your professional journey, if you would?

Judy Kane: Sure. It seems unlikely when people hear it, but when I look back on it, it's, you know, like anything, all the pieces contribute to where you are now, but most of my life, all, most of my you know, professional life was in IT management and that sounds very different. And then I had a few years as a realtor, which sounds even stranger.

But the the corporate background, particularly in IT was using strengths that I already had. I'm an analytic person. You know, and so in it, just like in some other professions like contractors and architects, you know, people talk to their clients about what's there and they find out what they would rather have that thing be, right.

The building, the system. When I talk with clients who are talking about their beliefs, right? Or, and what's going on in their life. So it's like, well, what's happening now? What would you rather be experiencing? And then we figure out what it's gonna take to get 'em from A to B to close that gap. So all of that analytic experience and being able to talk to people and get 'em to figure out how to define what they really want came from that background.

The IT background the five years as a realtor was it was helpful in showing me what's necessary to be an entrepreneur. Because at in corporate, I did not have to go out and look for, they were more than happy to throw projects over the wall at us. And so that was not an issue. But once you've got your own business, you need to, you know, know about networking and how to structure the business and the time and that type of thing.

So from that standpoint, that little bit of realtor exposure was good because by the time I started this business I knew some of the basics of what I was gonna need to be doing.

Mike O'Neill: When you and I talked last, I shared with you that I too have a corporate background, not IT but HR. And what I heard you describe is how you would work with your internal clients to clearly understand what is it that they need that it could perhaps solve, but your analytical approach and what you're doing now, I would've normally have said, oh, that doesn't fit. But I can see how that fits absolutely perfectly.

Judy Kane: It really does. It's been very helpful to, to have that just as a very natural way of talking to people about what they want.

Mike O'Neill: So let me ask, if someone's listening to this and they're thinking, oh, I think Judy can help me.

Does that mean that typically when you're working like that, that the engagement is relatively short?

Judy Kane: I see people for one hour at a time. Okay. Sometimes they book multiple sessions. Some people have a monthly subscription. They just bring in what they put things on their Judy list between sessions and they come in with whatever has popped up in the last month.

But it's one hour at a time. And We focus on whatever the most important thing is for that person at that point in time. And we just, we, I help 'em figure out if they don't know already how to define what they want. And then we go about the process of the actual change, which is the straight, that's very straightforward process.

Mike O'Neill: Judy, when we describe you help people get rid of their head trash and you said people automatically knows kind of what that means. It seems to me that some people can get rid of the head trash and never have to revisit it. There might be others who get rid of the head trash and no sooner is it gone, they start filling it back up again.

Do you find that's, do you find that distinction?

Judy Kane: So what I see is a variety of things around that topic. When we change our subconscious belief, that belief gets changed. Now, sometimes there are different levels of complexity, so you make progress, but there's still more there. Sometimes it's a pretty straightforward change, but people are still attached to the story about what was and in those cases, that's where a traditional coach can be very helpful because I don't do behavior or strategy or accountability. So, you know, having a coach or a therapist or somebody that can help with those conscious stories and strategies for how to alter behavior that has been entrenched that can be, you know, a real important aspect for the, some of the things that people are trying to change.

But you know, frequently there are just a lot of things there that get in your way. I've been doing this one myself since 2011 and I'm still finding things on a daily basis, so, oh, well there's another one, right? It's not the same thing. It's not like I've been. I'm trying to hammer this thing out for, what, 12 years now?

But there's still things that pop up. So if you're in, if you find that things keep coming up it probably hasn't gotten to the root cause of it that is making your head fill up with the trash.

Mike O'Neill: It's hard to describe the typical client, but do most of your clients come out of a corporate role or entrepreneurial role?

Judy Kane: Most of 'em at the moment that I see are entrepreneurs. Okay. Or coming for non-business reasons at all. I see. Yeah, cuz I get coaches that are life coaches and business coaches and relationship coaches, you know, all sorts of things since I'm not doing content, per se, the strategy and the behaviors.

What I do is not so dependent on the, you know, what type of the belief change they're trying to do.

Mike O'Neill: So why don't we talk a little bit about your entrepreneur clients. Okay. Do you find that there's a very common theme or themes that entrepreneurs struggle with that become head trash?

Judy Kane: Dude, the two most common things I see are related to safety and a sense of self-worth.

Because if they're in business frequently, one of the things they're trying to do is improve the results in their business. And so those are the two areas that most frequently seem to be impacting that success in the business. The fears can be about all sorts of things. They can be fear of success.

Fear of failure, a belief, you know, a scarcity mentality a fear of being seen or heard. You know, all sorts of things can get in the way. Money, beliefs, you know, we're all weirdly programmed about money. You know, it's the way you measure success, but a lot of families think it's not good to have too much of it, or that you need to work really hard for it, or you don't be wanna be like those people that have too much of it.

You know, there are all sorts of messages there that can make it unsafe in your subconsciouses. Set of rules to have too much of it. And then the worthiness is just as difficult, right? You might not think you deserve to be successful or that you know enough to be successful that you have the credentials.

You know, maybe it's the imposter syndrome. All sorts of things come into play with those.

Mike O'Neill: Yeah. Like you I came out of a corporate background. So my frame of reference was always corporate when I transitioned owning my own business. It's a whole new world and I know I have lots of friends who are still in the corporate world and they look at me and what I get to do and they might idealize it.

But it's hard. It's a different kind of hard. Do you find that, have you worked with folks who are transitioning from the corporate world into the entrepreneurial role?

Judy Kane: And frequently what I see them wanting to change the most, there's several things. One of 'em is they have a subconscious belief they won't be able to make as much as they did in their corporate job.

So they're limiting themselves there. Because, you know, at coming from HR, you well know there are. You know, limits to how many get, how much you get paid in any particular position, right? In a corporate job, nobody's got limits on what you do as an entrepreneur except yourself. So, you know, you've actually got a better chance realistically of making those changes than you do in, you know, making incremental increases in corp, you know, jumps in corporate.

So that's one of 'em that I frequently see, but a lot of it is the reluctance to do what they consider to be sales. They don't cons, you know, they think sales is a different animal and maybe not the role that they want to be comfortable in. So that's hard. Sometimes they have a really difficult time figuring out what to charge.

Yes. Because they don't feel like they deserve the going rate, particularly when they get started. They might feel like they need more credentials and more credentials to, to feel like they deserve to have their own business. Reluctance to get out there and be seen. You know, if you've got a fear of being seen or heard that's challenging If you're trying to attract people to your business.

Mike O'Neill: You know, Judy, I'm just checking off the boxes as you list them. All of the above, and I think most who make that transition have to chart their path through that. Judy, I introduce you as also an author. I have not read your book. If I was to grab it and attempt to summarize your book for somebody else, how do you summarize your book?

Judy Kane: So it's based on things I've noticed with clients and myself over the years. Four categories where I see people. Struggling the most to have that life where they're truly fulfilled and, you know, enjoying things. And the four categories are that, you know, in order to have that complete life, you need to feel like you're safe.

You need to feel like you're worthy and that you're valued by others. You need to feel lovable and connected to something bigger than yourself. So this book goes through those four truths. The book's name is your Your4Truths. And so those are the truths that, that you are those things and gives clues on how you might see that you've got subconscious beliefs that are hampering that reality for yourself. So yeah, that's what it does. It just talks about how you might notice if these things are happening, then they're probably subconscious beliefs that are contributing to the situation.

Mike O'Neill: No, you've already, I think, answered this question, but I wanna give you a chance to answer maybe more specifically.

Can you share an example where either you or a client in fact did get stuck, and what did it take to get unstuck?

Judy Kane: Yeah, well one of my favorite ones, cuz it's me and I don't mind sharing stories about me as much as I, you know, think harder about when I'm sharing a story about a client, right? I used to be terrified of people seeing me, you know everybody staring at me? I had, I took piano lessons for 12 years and the recitals were just brutal. I was horrified to be up there on a stage by myself playing the piano. And that carried through to all sorts of things where I just did not want to be in the spotlight. Well, when I started my business I went out, started networking.

I could, you know, manage the 30-second introductions. I met somebody who had a web TV show who heard me in one of these meetings and said she'd like for me to be a guest on her show. Which my practical brain immediately said, that would be great. Thank you so much. I would love to do it. We set a time and the whole time in my body is like going, no, this is a bad idea.

So I came home and I started working on every aspect of this that I possibly could, because. It would've been really painful for me, for her, for the audience, for everybody. They probably would've just cut it, you know, cut it off and said, thanks, but we're going away now. It really would've been a not fun.

And I got to where I thought I was feeling okay about it, but driving over to the studio I noticed there was still this one little twinge of something. So before I got outta the car I took care of that last belief with the process I used. And I was so glad I did, cuz I walked in there, there were six live cameras trained on the two chairs.

It was an hour long show. And if I hadn't done that, I mean, it really would've been just such a bad situation. And as it was I enjoyed it. When I looked at it later, it was, I was pleasantly surprised. I didn't look uninformed or uncomfortable, you know, it was really, I was very pleased with the way it turned out.

But it would've been just a whole nother story if I hadn't had the tools that I could use immediately with myself to change whatever those beliefs were that were causing the discomfort.

Mike O'Neill: I appreciate you sharing that example. You know, as you look back on what you've been able to do for clients and how life's changed, what aspects of that has given you the most sense of accomplishment?

Judy Kane: I really enjoy what I do, working with people. I know that when we finish an hour, their life is gonna be better in some aspect. It might be a small change, it might be a really significant change, but I know that something has been done that eases a little bit of the stress that they experience going forward.

And so, so I mean, when I finish the session, I am like this. That was great. You know, the, I, when I sit, have a day full of clients, it's I have more energy at the end of the day than I did when I started. So this is a very fulfilling thing. I think it's right on purpose for me. And so I love that.

But the thing that I like the most is letting people find out if they didn't already know. They don't have to be stuck with these things that are troubling them that they can change these things and, you know, make things different. They can choose what it is that they wanna be true and we can do that.

Mike O'Neill: Yeah. I'm so pleased to learn that you have found something that fits your skills, it fits your temperament and that you're able to see differences made. And I always get a little bit frustrated when I talk to folks whose life's work is unfulfilling and that's sad.

Yes. It is very sad.

Judy Kane: And they're usually doing that because of whatever it is they're trying to avoid, right? They there's a fear there, or a lack of trust in themselves and they could be so much happier.

Mike O'Neill: You know, you wrote the book and you've got your four truths, if you would. Have you found that in your work with clients it's simply affirmed those four truths or would you find yourself adding a fifth or others?

Judy Kane: Well, you know, I, when I was almost through writing this one I came up with a couple of ideas for follow up books. And that's still a possibility for sure. These are still the main things I see. But you know, there's always a next level, right?

Of or different aspects of the same thing. The subconscious is strangely nuanced. You can find one belief that it believes completely in something that sounds very similar to it, that it doesn't. So, you know, there's. There's complexity there that can always be explored.

Mike O'Neill: You know? Gee, we've covered a wide range of topics.

As you reflect on this conversation, what do you want those folks who have watched or listened to this episode to remember?

Judy Kane: I want 'em to remember that when things keep repeating for no apparent reason, they find themselves doing the same thing over and over again or being in the same situations over and over again that are not to their liking, they're probably subconscious beliefs that are working against them there. And then the big thing takeaway is those can be changed. So they're not stuck with it. They don't have to live with this. It's not just the way their life is gonna be.

Mike O'Neill: And I know you're not saying stuck over and over again because that's the name of this podcast.

Now I know we're getting some feedback. I hope you can hear me okay. But if folks have heard something that you've shared and they want to learn more, what's the best way for them to reach out to you?

Judy Kane: They can go to my website,, and there's they can book a 15 minute free call. If they have questions or there's a whole page there of free resources that they can download to learn more about subconscious beliefs and you know, to see if they still think there's something there that's applying to them.

Mike O'Neill: Gotcha. And if they want to connect with you beyond the website, are you out there on LinkedIn or other ways?

Judy Kane: I am. I'm on LinkedIn. I'm on Facebook. I've got a ton of podcasts that's, those are also linked onto my website. So there are lots of ways to find me.

Mike O'Neill: Well, let me just remind the folks who are listening.

This is Judy Kane and that's k a n e. She's the founder of Aligned Consciousness, and we're gonna include not only links to your website, your LinkedIn profile but also how they might, could get your book. Oh, thank you. Yeah. So Judy, thank you. I was looking forward to this conversation. You're such a refreshing person to speak with.

This was obviously very easy for me cuz you know your stuff and you have such a natural way. Thank you for sharing your gifts and your passion with us today.

Judy Kane: Thank you so much for having me here. I've enjoyed it Mike.

Mike O'Neill: I also wanna thank our listeners for joining us today. If you'd like to subscribe to this podcast, you can just go to your browser and type

But while you're there, you can also subscribe to our weekly management blog called The Bottom Line. So I invite our listeners, if you're trying to grow your business, but people problems have slowed you down, let's talk head over to our website, to schedule a call. I wanna thank everyone who has joined us.

And I hope you have picked up on some tips from Judy, they'll help you get unstuck and on target. Until next time.

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